When Hope is not Enough

In May of 2025, I should have been full of hope. After 48 months, I finally graduated from my counseling degree program. I am the first person in my immediate family to earn a postgraduate degree. It was, and still is, a huge accomplishment for me and my family.

So why didn't it feel like one?

I was never a traditional student, but deciding to start grad school at 39 was a choice. Often, I thought I should have just sat there and eaten my bran flakes.

My entire college career was fraught with multiple starts and stops, deaths, divorce, and, lest we forget, the big D, depression. In total, I have spent more than 20 years in some form of higher education.

And would this even be worth it?

Would it be like my adjuster license, a waste of time and money?

Especially when I got my first job offer from an EAP company starting at $19 an hour. I remember thinking, Damn, my first-year professor was right. There ain't no money in this profession.

That was when I was at my lowest.

I thought about quitting.

Sometimes it feels like that. Like quitting is the only thing that makes sense. When your hope is running low and you find yourself thinking, I should give up or It's not worth it.

But what if it is?

How do you know if you stop trying? If you stop hoping for another chance or a better day?

When hope is not enough to hold you up, lean on your support system. Focus on your why.

What happens to a dream deferred?

I don't know what you may be experiencing, and I know you are tired. But hold on to hope and live to fight another day.

Toree Thomas